June Yates-Boykin

A beautifully constructed stone retainer wall, roughly four feet tall, kept the higher ground in place.  Sets of wide steps built periodically into the bulwark provided passage to the park above. There, grand old oak trees and well-manicured flower gardens invited people to take some time from their busy schedule to relax with the captivating view of the lake that lay further down at the base of the incline.

Living among the small, rolling hills of South Lake County, seeing the park on higher ground with an ornate retainer wall wasn’t in any way foreign to me.  Nor was the wide concrete pad poured at its base which served as a level walkway and bike path.  There sat I.   

Why on earth I chose to sit on concrete leaned up against a stone wall I have no idea.  In the natural, that would not have been my seat of choice. You would have found me in the soft green grass or on picnic benches just a few steps above me.  But this was not the natural.  Again, God chose to teach me something through supernatural vision.

I sat to enjoy the view and the warm sunshine.  Birds chirped and playful dogs barked.  The air offered the smell of gardenias from nearby blooms. I never cease to be amazed by God’s creative handiwork, and always feel closer to him outdoors than in.

My peripheral vision soon picked up on someone approaching me from the grassy area above my head.  I turned, looking slightly upward, and saw from about the knees down who I instantly knew was Jesus.  The white robe and sandaled feet assured me this was no ordinary person on an ordinary stroll in the park.  Stopping on my left where but one more step would have been the four foot drop to my level, He bent and extended His hand for me to take hold.

“You want to go with me?”

Quickly I turned, looked up and stretched my hand to reach his.   “Yes, I do,” I couldn’t get to my feet fast enough.  “Where are we going?”

His response another question, “Does it matter?”

Immediately I was back in the here and now.  I had envisioned the scene, but with stark imagery that has not left me over these many years. The entire episode lasted probably less than a minute, yet has had life-long impact. 

Too many times we sing songs like, “Where he leads me I will follow” or “I’m going with Jesus all the way,” only to protest once we realize that might actually mean going into a career or ministry we didn’t plan for.  If it means leaving our hometown or family and friends behind, we say, “No, thank you,” and rely on God’s grace to bless us right where we are.  If he is headed somewhere to people or situations that are uncomfortable for us, we fall back on the “I just don’t feel good about it in my spirit,” way out.  When the path gets a little rocky or the road too long, we are quick to take a new route.  It can be even worse when he leads us to a work that we deem beneath us or not good enough. 

It seems we always want to know where he is taking us before we agree to go, all the while singing, “I’ll go with him through the garden.”

Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.” Luke 9:23, NKJV

I’ve grown to love him more over time.  My desire to please him has become first in my  life.  It’s what I want more than anything.  That has been easier to follow through on since I learned to trust him more.  He is going to tell me everything I need to know.  He is not going to lead me anywhere to do anything that he will not be right there working with me.  His plans for me are good ones. 

Not too long ago as I was sitting in his presence I heard him ask, “Will you…”  Before I even had a chance to think, I threw up my hand and said, “Yes, Lord.  I will.  I will need your help, but I will.”  After a moment I asked, “Will I what?”

“We’ll talk that about that later.  I wanted to see if you would say yes before you knew what I was asking of you.”  Of course, he already knew.  He wanted me to know, too, and to be aware of what that answer might mean.

I sat quiet for a while examining myself.  I thought seriously about the commitment I had just made to my Lord.  Yes, it was a commitment.  Will I follow through?  Even if it’s something I really don’t want to do, will I?  To the very best of my ability I will.  I love him that much, and I trust his love for me.

For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11, NKJV

Psalm 91:16 tells us he will satisfy us with long life – not depress or torment us with it.

How much do we really want to be with Jesus and to please him?  Do we love him to the moon and back?  Will we follow him to the ends of the earth?  When He invites us to walk with him every day, does our answer depend upon where He is going?  Does it matter? 

Think before you answer, because I heard he’s going to church Sunday.

I’ll stand for thee, dear Jesus, though death my come my way

I’ll spread the gospel to the fallen here.

But if it be thy will, Lord, to go across the sea,

Lord help me to be willing to say yes.

from Jesus Use Me written by Jack and Billy Campbell.

Till next time,

June

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